Linda Schottmueller’s Me and Philip Seymour Hoffman

Hi everyone, My name is Linda,  and I’m a local author. After the passing of one of my most influential icons I felt compelled to write about my experiences with him. The web site owner, has given me a page to help share this.

Philip taking a picture of me (I hope)

Philip taking a picture of me (I hope)

 

 

 

 

Here is an excerpt from my upcoming book, Me and Philip Seymour Hoffman which will be due out soon.  In addition to this excerpt, I will share with you some of my potential chapter titles:

  • My Introduction to Philip
  • The audacity of Phil Parma
  • Quirky? Not by a long shot.
  • What would our children look like?
  • Betrayal! Mission: Impossible III?!
  • Would he prefer Red or Turqoise?
  • Another enchanted evening with my Hoffy.
  • Fuck her, she doesn’t deserve you!
  • Another rejection backstage?

And many more.  So, write me or wait till my print announcement!

Me and my dogs, Philip and Seymour

Me and my dogs, Philip and Seymour

I leave you with the immortal words of Brandt, “Well, enjoy. And perhaps we’ll see you again.”

Linda.

Me and Philip Seymour Hoffman

An excerpt from the upcoming book by Linda Shottmueller:

I knew Philip. Well, perhaps not physically knew him but I knew him.  I knew him enough that he influenced my young life at the time.

I first encountered Philip when I was ten. It was the year 2001 and my mother, god bless her, always seemed to fashion herself as a displaced flower child. That explains why, every day after my father went to work, she would put ‘Almost Famous’ in the DVD player and go about her day.

As I would sit and watch the movie over and over the one person that captured my attention was Lester Bangs. His mannerisms and reactions captivated me deeply.  Then, later, I saw the same man in another movie, ‘The Big Lebowski’ only he was called Brandt in that. How could he have two different names?

Now, I’m sure most of you are wondering how I, a child of ten, would be home to watch movies during the day. Well, in addition to being a free spirit, my mother believed in home schooling. As far as she was concerned the only one good enough to teach her child was herself. After all, it’s what the animals in the wild did for their offspring and they turned out okay she would argue. And, to be honest, I think I turned out all right, after my fifth husband, fourth abortion, and second child I’ve really learned to settle in.

Anyways, after I learned that he was an ‘Actor’ things became that much clearer. And his influence and guidance in my life blossomed.

My mother noticed this new found attention to Philip and she began to take advantage of it.  During lunch, after my class of ‘Hydroponics theory’ and before my ‘The Lie about Marriage and Men’ class, I sometimes had a hard time eating. I’ve learned now that dishes such as stewed carrots and parsnips are good, but at my young age I didn’t appreciate them much, and I would hesitate to eat. But, my mother, the wise soul that she was, would tell me. “Philip Seymour Hoffman eats his strained turnips, and look at what he does!” Well, that’s all my ten year old brain had to hear, and before I knew it I was asking for seconds. Soon after that I was discovering him as Freddy, Wilson, and Dean.

 It was a magical time for me.

More to come soon!

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